Stop Proving. Start Owning.

I recently attended the SOAR conference by Bluebird Leaders, a space created to connect, uplift, and inspire women in healthcare IT leadership. It was a weekend filled with authenticity, energy, and reflection. A reminder of why community matters and how powerful it can be when women come together with intention.

For most of my life, I’ve been driven by the need to prove myself, to show that I belonged, that I had earned my seat, that I was capable of holding my own. When you’ve had to work twice as hard to be heard or taken seriously, that mindset becomes part of your rhythm.

But somewhere along the way, proving turns into pressure. And pressure turns into noise.

Every morning at SOAR began with yoga and breathwork. For me, it wasn’t new. Meditation has long been part of my daily routine, something that helps me stay grounded before the day unfolds. But there was something powerful about sharing that stillness with a room full of women leaders who carried both grace and grit. There was quiet strength in that space. No competition, no performance, no need to defend your place.

It reminded me that while self-awareness begins within, grounded leadership grows through connection.

That morning, I didn’t just inhale clarity or exhale stress. I felt what it means to breathe collectively, to be surrounded by women who believe in each other’s growth and power.

Finding Your Tribe

SOAR reminded me how powerful it is to find your people, the ones who don’t need you to edit yourself to fit in. The ones who see your ambition, your conviction, and your light, and don’t tell you it’s too much.

One of the speakers said something that stayed with me:

“I’m sorry you’re uncomfortable with my confidence.”

It wasn’t said with defiance; it was said with peace. A reminder that confidence isn’t something to shrink or apologize for. It’s something to own.

Because confidence doesn’t mean arrogance; it means alignment. It’s knowing who you are and showing up that way, no matter the room you walk into.

And that’s the power of finding your tribe. Bluebird Leaders reminded me what that feels like, and Tech She Secures is how I continue to build it.

Owning Your Power

I left SOAR reflecting on what kind of leader I want to be.

I don’t want to lead from exhaustion or ego. I want to lead from presence, from that same grounded calm that comes after a mindful pause. I want to lead with clarity, courage, compassion, and authenticity.

To me, leadership isn’t about being the loudest in the room. It’s about being the steady one, the one who listens, empowers, and creates space for others to rise. It’s about choosing calm over chaos, grace over grind, and purpose over proving.

Leadership, I’ve learned, is a reflection of your energy. And when you lead from alignment, not urgency, everything flows differently.

SOAR reminded me that power doesn’t always roar. Sometimes it’s quiet. Sometimes it’s the exhale, the moment you stop striving and start standing firmly in who you are.

That’s what true ownership feels like: steady, grounded, and real.

Recognize. Respond. Rise.

As I reflect on this past month and the year behind me, I’m learning to let go of the need to prove and hold on to the power of being present and real.

Recognize your worth.

Respond to your purpose.

And rise, not because someone let you, but because you decided to.

Because the moment you stop proving and start owning, everything shifts.

As Tech She Secures celebrates its first anniversary, this reflection feels like a reminder of why I started it: to create a space where authenticity, courage, and purpose aren’t just celebrated, but lived.

And to anyone reading this, find your tribe. Find the people who remind you to breathe, to believe, and to keep rising.

Maliha

Disclaimer: The content on this blog and website reflects a combination of my personal experiences, perspectives, and insights, as well as interviews and contributions from other individuals. It does not represent the opinions, policies, or strategies of any organization I am currently affiliated with or have been affiliated with in the past. This platform serves as a personal space for sharing ideas, lessons learned, and meaningful reflections.